Monday finally came and I was scheduled at 8am for my brain MRI. My vision was worse than ever...I could only see a sliver of the floor out of my right eye. I was driving to Adirondack Imaging and probably shouldn't have been because I could barely see!
When I got there I had to fill out paperwork, which was rather difficult because I had to move my head left to right an order to read it and fill it out...I couldn't see the whole page right in front of me! I began to realize the importance of two healthy eyes rather quickly.
I was brought into a room with a large wall with a cylindrical hole tunneled in it. The technician pushed a button and a wooden slab, which was the size of a bed, slid out of the tunnel. I lied down on the cold, hard bed and placed my head on an a small piece of foam. The technician then placed a small white cage over the lower half of my face and pushed down...I heard a loud pop, as it locked into place.
"Your not claustrophobic...right?" She said nervously.
"I don't think so," I replied uneasily.
"Well, I have to put one more piece over your face. Let me know, if your not okay?"
Another cage was place over the upper half of my face...she slid it down and I heard another pop. I began to get very nervous. I felt like I was in jail or worse yet, like I was Hannibal Lecter.
"Please lie very still and try not to move."
I heard the door close and felt the bed sliding into the tunnel. I couldn't see what was happening around me. I felt cold, alone and scared.
The MRI lasted 45 minutes and I couldn't close my eyes and rest because I could hear a loud knocking coming from the walls around me. I thought it would never end.
Afterwards, I went home and did nothing, but worry. My husband Jimmy, which wasn't much of a husband, was running my gift shop in Lake George. I couldn't trust him, not to do anything. He lied to me so frequently that I couldn't believe anything he said. I didn't know if he was at the store...or what was going on. I felt helpless and foolish. I married a man who only used me for what I could give him. He never cared to work, to help me...and he didn't care what was happening to me!
The next morning, I remember the phone call that change my life forever...my general practitioner was calling at 7:45...I knew him calling this early wasn't good news.
"Well Rosary, it appears you have multiple sclerosis," he said nonchalantly. "I scheduled you an appointment with the neurologist Dr. Sole at 11am today. Let me patch you over to the receptionist and she will give you the address."
I thought...What was multiple sclerosis? I've heard of people having that, but didn't know what it was. What's a neurologist? What does a neurologist do? What's fucking wrong with me? I didn't understand.
I didn't know at the time, that this diagnosis was only the beginning. That multiple sclerosis would turn my whole world upside down!
Read the beginning of this story here.
Read the previous installment of this story here.
No comments:
Post a Comment